Wednesday, August 9th, 2011: “Day 3: Ohio, Indiana, Illinois”
Good morning, Cleveland!
After a few hours of good night’s sleep, we found ourselves roughly 500 miles away from home and there was no turning back! Aided with the power of Brian’s new HP tablet (which would also play a pivotal role later in our road trip) and Yelp! user reviews, our goal was to be tourists and see as much of what Ohio had to offer as we possibly could. Number one on the to-do list was to grab some tasty breakfast grub and the first thing that popped up in our search was a place called “Jack Frost Donuts.”
As we approached the donut shop, we were a little turned off by the appearance, but learned an important lesson in not judging a book by it’s cover. We met the owner and founder of the restaurant, “Laurie”, and asked for her recommendations. Being the extremely fhat boys that we are, we ordered a half dozen donuts including flavors such as strawberry cheesecake, banana split, chocolate cake, caramel, etc. The donuts were incredible and lived up to the 4.5 star reviews, putting Krispy Kremes to shame in terms of taste, flavor and believe it or not, caloric intake. We each scarfed down one each and would annihilate the rest of the box before noon.
The GPS took us through a few local suburban towns on the outskirts of Cleveland and finally into the city, passing through landmarks such as Progressive Field (the Indians’ ballpark) and the building where LeBron’s poster had previously been ripped down (bitter much?). We drove towards to pier towards our next must-see location: the Rock N’ Roll Hall of Fame!
The museum was basically everything you’d expect it to be and more. Security was extremely strict about taking any type of video or photography, but we were able to snap a few good shots with the huge Michael Jackson white glove and a few guitars that were on display in the lobby. Still, it was well worth making a trip out to check it out, especially if you’re a fan of rock music. The building was shaped like a pyramid and each of the exhibits were displayed chronologically as you made your way towards the top. It was definitely interesting to see how rock music has progressed over the past few decades.
They had original lyrics, telegrams, letters and records from the Jackson 5, Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, Elton John, Elvis and the Beatles just to name a few. There were also several original outfits on display including Michael Jackson’s zombie jacket from his Thriller video and Lady Gaga’s meat dress, which she wore during the MTV Music Awards a few years back. There was a shrine dedicated to all of the Hall of Fame inductees, a pretty sweet video that detailed how “video killed the radio star” and a section about “Girls Who Rock” (even Christina Aguilera got her own display thanks to her “glory days” in the late 90’s). Since we didn’t have the time or patience to sit and read through all of the captions (that would’ve taken hours and hours), we breezed through each exhibit in about two hours. It was a cool experience that you should check out if you ever happen to be in Ohio.
After taking some touristy pictures by the enormous “FREE” stamp which was just steps from the R&R Hall of Fame, we got back in the car and headed west for lunch.
As we were planning out our road trip months in advance, we made it our goal to try as many restaurants featured on Man vs. Food as possible. Being in Ohio, we had our eyes set on the “Melt Bar and Grill,” a famous restaurant about 15 minutes west that featured good food, pretty awesome beers and the ultimate Melt Challenge: described on its web site as a “monster grilled cheese featuring 13 different cheeses, 3 slices of grilled bread and a pile of hand-cut fries & slaw. Over 5 lbs. of food!”. (See the Man vs. Food YouTube video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AeFjYZAik3o).
We waited a good hour before we were seated (and remember, we were here on a random Wednesday afternoon!). The place was packed from the get-go. We spent our time boozing and talking to a local who got really excited once he heard that we were trekking across the country. I gulped down a “Creme Brulee” flavored beer. Now I’m not a fan of dark brews, but it was definitely a winner.
Once seated, the fhat boys got to work. We each ordered our own starter - melted pierogas, spinach artichoke chips and dip, and crab cakes. And of course, for our main entree, we decided to split the ginormous Melt Challenge. What the heck were we thinking? The couple sitting next to us watched in disbelief and wished us luck. After we told them that we were planning to hit up some roller coasters at Cedar Point afterward, he straight up told us that we were going to puke. But more on that later.
Supposedly to make a 13-cheese, 5 pound grilled cheese sandwich(es), it takes about an hour for “preparation.” Already stuffed from the appetizers, the waiter came out with our grilled cheese behemoth. Keep in mind that I’m lactose intolerant. Not gonna be pretty. We basically stuffed our faces and ate as much as humanely possible. I thought that we did decently well considering how much we had already eaten. I would say that we conquered at least 2/3’s of the plate. Scratch that… I think Brian and I conquered at least one third of the plate and Clint conquered the other third.
With our stomachs full and different types of cheese swirling inside of them, we did perhaps the dumbest thing yet: we headed for the “Roller Coaster Capital of the World,” otherwise known as Cedar Point, in Sandusky, Ohio. Luckily, we had a good hour drive which gave our stomachs at least a little time to digest all of the food that we had devoured at Melt Bar. Whether it would be enough remained to be seen.
Thanks to a $58 Rock N Roll Hall of Fame + Cedar Point special, we saved some cash that would later be spent on waters and iced lemonades. We found parking easily and there wasn’t a line to get in. From the distance, we saw a few crazy coasters pop up in the distance. I haven’t ridden one in at least a few years and I was psyched. The couple from the grilled cheese spot told us to check out Millennium Force and the Top Thrill Dragster. The test was on to see how the “Roller Coaster Capital of the World” would compare to Six Flags Great Adventure.
FYI, Clinton is afraid of heights. Clinton does not like roller coasters. It was up to Brian and me to convince him to jump on a few of them with us. The lines weren’t too bad - we waited the longest for the Millennium Force (about 45 minutes or so).
- Raptor - We jumped on the first coaster that we saw. It was alright, very “Viper”-esque. As our car slowly made it’s way up the tracks, I think Clint soiled himself. I have never seen him more serious in my life.
- Mean Streak - A coaster made entirely of wood. It had some pretty sweet drops and was one of the better rides I’ve been on in a while. After this one, Clint couldn’t hold in his grilled cheese much longer and basically ran to the Men’s bathroom to hurl. Luckily, I caught it on camera!
- Magnum XL-200 - Great roller coaster. Topped 200 feet at speeds of over 72mph. We had to do this one without Clint since he was recovering from Barf Fest ‘11.
- The Mantis - Decent ride, lots of loops, but ended up with a huge headache.
- Millenium Force - Saved this one for last. We waited about 45 minutes and once it was our turn, we hopped into the car, stoked as all hell. All of a sudden, one of the attendants screams “POWER OUTAGE!” Just our friggin luck. We are soon told to get out of the car, fearing that the ride would be closed since it was already 8:30PM. A good 15 minutes of anxiety later, the ride is fixed and we get on. Verdict? 100% worth the wait. This ride is literally the mother of all roller coasters aka the best one that I’ve ever been on. In. My. Life. Their web site describes it as the following: “It’s a coaster so big and tall, we had to coin a new name for this type of steel scream machine - the Giga Coaster. Millennium Force is the park’s star attraction, standing 310 feet above the Earth. It broke 10 world records when it opened in 2000 and continues to deliver ultimate thrills to those who challenge it. Dive to the ground at an 80-degree angle and reach speeds of 93 mph during your two-minute journey.” Worth every second of waiting. At the top of the drop, you get a sweet view of Lake Erie and then plunge hundreds of feet downwards. Finishes at the top of my list, with Six Flags’ Nitro coming at a distant second.
We weren’t able to ride the Dragster, but we were fine with it. It looked like the King Da Ka on steroids, but thought it would be best to hit the road and starting heading for ChiTown, which was a solid 5 hours away.
By this time, it was nightfall, so we made our way to Indiana, where we snapped our first state border picture. We finally got to Chicago around 2AM and I had the chance to see the skyline - awesome view!
We drove about an hour north to Clint’s relatives house, where we would be staying for the night. Luckily for us, there was a huge pie of deep dish pizza waiting on the kitchen table.
We were now about 15 hours away from home with a lot of asphalt ahead of us, but satisfied with being able to conquer a few of our road trip bucket list items. Good day. Good day, indeed.
